


Staying Afloat

by trepkos



Category: Arthur of the Britons
Genre: M/M, Swimming, Teenagers, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-03
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2017-10-23 09:49:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/248988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trepkos/pseuds/trepkos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kai learns to swim.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Staying Afloat

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Ideserveyou for beta reading.

High summer: so hot, that the young Celts – even some of the girls – spend as much time as they can in the river. They play like young otters, sleek and agile, as if they were themselves part of the water.

Kai sits on the bank; he won’t go in. 

He can’t.

He hasn’t learned to swim.

But Arthur is in there, sporting among the rest.

Kai doesn’t like to see Arthur having fun without him, and he hates it when his little brother’s head is underwater. What if he forgets how to find the surface? Gets trapped down there, where Kai can’t come to save him? What if he drowns … as Kai once nearly did, so long ago?

“Come on, Kai,” one of the boys calls out. He laughs and nudges another in the ribs. “Why don’t you come in? What are you afraid of?”

“Nothing!” Kai says. “Swimming is boring, that’s all.” 

“Can’t you swim?”

“Of course I can!” 

“Do Saxons melt in water?” another shouts.

Arthur stands up and pushes that boy in the chest. “Leave Kai alone!”

Kai doesn’t want Arthur getting in trouble on his account. “I’d rather practice my axe work, than mess around all day.” 

But they all know the truth.

Kai stomps off to the practice-ground, and sweats in the summer heat, hacking at the dummies.

Before … Arthur would have left the others; come to practice with him. But things are different now.

~~

Next day, when Arthur goes down to cool off after a hard morning – his nose stuck in his books, under the abbot’s tutelage – he finds Kai standing in the river. 

A barrage of stones comes from the gang of youths lined up along the bank, as they laugh and jeer.

Arthur pulls off his tunic, dives in, and swims out; stands with Kai against the pack. 

The stoning stops at once. 

Arthur shouts, “Get away from here, all of you!” 

Most drop their stones, and back away. 

Arthur grabs Kai around the waist, to stop him going after them.

A few of the boys whistle; a last few rocks come flying over from the back of the crowd.

“Didn’t you hear me?” Arthur yells.

They wander off: some, pushing and shoving; others looking back over their shoulders, with knowing looks on their faces.

“What are you doing in here?” Arthur says. “You can’t swim.”

“I know,” Kai says, clenching his teeth to stop them chattering, as he stands, sodden and shivering, in the shadow of the river bank. “And so do they. The rotten bastards threw me in.”

The boys Kai’s age are all too big for Arthur to take on alone; they only do what Arthur says because of who he is. He feels a helpless rage come over him.

“I could have them beaten,” Arthur says. “Llud would –”

“That would just make things worse.” Kai sploshes disconsolately to the shore.

Arthur goes after him, and puts a hand on his arm. “Kai … why don’t you let me teach you how to swim?”

“I don’t want to swim.”

“What are you afraid of?” 

“Nothing.” Kai climbs up the bank, and stands there, dripping. “I’m not afraid of anything.” 

“Except a drop of water.” Arthur climbs up to join him. “What a girl you are.”

Kai shoves him back down the slope. “I’ll show you who’s a girl!”

“Later, perhaps,” Arthur says. He didn’t mean to say it, but it just slipped out.

Kai blinks, and looks confused. 

His clothes cling to him; he’s so thin, his ribs stick out. As Arthur climbs back up the bank, his eyes come level with the sharp angles of Kai’s hips, and with what’s outlined by the wet fabric of his breeches. Kai’s been in cold water, and yet …

“We should take these wet things off,” Arthur says, hoping.

“No. I’m fine – leave me alone.”

“Well, I’m not sitting in wet breeches all day.” Wondering at his own audacity, Arthur strips off, and lays his breeches on a warm, flat rock.

Reluctantly, Kai strips himself, and lays his clothes out next to Arthur’s.

They both lie down on the grass, and let the sun banish the gooseflesh from their skin.

After a while, Arthur steals a glance at Kai.

At rest, Kai always wears a look of slight anxiety. Arthur wishes he could banish that look, and see him smile more often.

He picks up a smooth, green pebble, and places it on Kai’s furrowed brow. “You might need to be able to swim one day.” 

Kai opens one eye. “Why?” He removes the pebble, examines it, then sets it down on Arthur’s upper lip. “Why should I?”

“Well –” The pebble is dislodged, and Arthur catches it, and balances it on Kai’s chin: “– what if you fall in?” 

“You will pull me out.” Kai takes the stone, and, without looking, drops it into the hollow of Arthur’s throat. “Like you did today.”

Arthur picks up the pebble, and puts in the middle of Kai’s chest. “And what if I’m not around?” 

Kai frowns, as if he can’t imagine it.

“What if you need to get away from someone, and have to cross a lake, or river?” Arthur rolls the stone under the flat of his hand, down into Kai’s belly-button. 

Kai shivers; Arthur would have missed it, if he had, for a moment, looked away – but why on earth would he do that?

“Then I’ll fight them.” Kai raises his head to look down at his stomach; the muscles tighten, making the pebble judder. “Then I won’t need to escape.”

He sits up, takes the stone, and moves his hand towards Arthur.

Arthur holds his breath.

Kai snorts, and throws the pebble far out into the water, almost to the other bank.

Arthur bites his lip, sits up, selects another stone, and throws it after Kai’s.

Kai looks at him sidelong. “So – how did you learn to swim?” 

“It’s so long ago, I can’t remember.”

“And you weren’t afraid?”

“Perhaps, at first. But I soon learned I didn’t need to be. I learned to trust the water. Trust it to hold you up, and it will.”

“It’s never held me up before,” Kai grumbles.

“Did you expect it to?”

“No.” Kai picks up another stone, looks at it, then puts it down again. “You talk as if water were a living thing.”

“I sometimes feel that it is. If you think it will let you down – if you panic, and slap it, and thrash around – then it won’t do you any favours. Just like a person, in fact.”

“Like you, you mean.”

“Come on, Kai. Please – just let me try and teach you. Don’t tell me that Arthur can do something his big brother cannot master.”

“Well, how do I start?” Kai says, relenting a little. “I won’t know what to do with my arms and legs.”

“Alright. I’ll show you.”

Arthur gets up and pulls on his clothes; Kai does the same.

Arthur lies across a fallen log, with his arms and legs out on either side, and makes kicking movements with his legs, and spreading movements with his arms.

“I’ll never remember that,” Kai says. “It looks too complicated.”

“Of course you will.”

Kai shifts from foot to foot. “Not when I’m in the water, drowning, I won’t.”

“You didn’t think you could ride a horse at first. You managed that alright.”

Kai’s shoulders sag. “And look how long that took me! I’m so slow.”

“This is easier.”

Kai is not convinced. He’s gawky – all angles, and big bones; big feet, and ill at ease in his own skin.

“Well, perhaps we should start in the water,” Arthur says. “You can learn how to kick, and I’ll hold your hands, and help you stay afloat.”

Kai swallows. “You’ll hold my hands?” 

“Well, your arms then, alright?”

“… alright,” Kai says. “But … not here. I don’t want everyone to see me making a fool of myself.”

“Past the bend in the river then. Tomorrow, when they’re at weapons training. I’ll tell Llud we’ve something more important to do.”

“You think he’ll believe you?”

“Of course,” Arthur says. “After all, it’s true.” 

~~

So the next morning, they go down to a meander in the river, out of sight of the village, where the water’s calm. It’s another hot day; crickets chirp in the grasses.

They strip off their clothes.

Arthur is trying not to stare; Kai doesn’t seem to see how badly he is failing.

At sixteen or thereabouts, Kai is long and lean; he’s growing fast, and Arthur finds his gaze drawn to the golden hairs sprinkling his thighs; his glance skims Kai’s cock: by the gods, he’s big … stop looking … up over the ridged muscles of his stomach, the pale pink of his –

“Wake up!” Kai snaps his fingers under Arthur’s nose.

Arthur shakes his head.

Kai laughs, and musses Arthur’s hair.

He hasn’t done that for so long …

“Where were you?” Kai says. “Was it nice there?”

Arthur laughs, embarrassed. “Shall we get on with it?” 

They wade into the water, and stand waist-deep. 

“Now, put your face in the water,” Arthur says. 

“Put my face in the water?”

“Like Llud does in the horse trough, if he’s drunk too much mead last night. Go on. Get your head wet! Like this ...”

Arthur puts his face in the water, shakes his head about, then comes up, dripping and grinning.

Kai does the same. When he comes up, he says, “That’s not swimming.”

“But you’ve learned that getting your face wet doesn’t hurt. Now take a deep breath, put your face in, and open your mouth.” 

“You are trying to drown me!” Kai protests.

“No, breathe in first, then put your head down, and open your mouth, but keep breathing out – don’t let the water go down your throat. Just blow some bubbles, then come up.”

Kai does as Arthur says; blows bubbles, then flicks his head back, laughing, and spluttering, and shaking his head like a dog. “What’s next?”

“Alright. Now hold my arms.”

Kai takes hold of Arthur’s forearms, just below the elbows. 

They look into each other’s eyes, and Arthur has to catch his breath. 

“Trust me,” Arthur says.

“I think so.” 

“It wasn’t a question, it was an order.”

Kai’s eyes flash.

“You’ll have to obey my orders one day, Kai. You might as well start now.”

Kai drops his gaze. “Alright. What do you command me to do, oh Great Leader?”

“Lie on your front in the water, and let your feet float out behind you.”

Kai lowers himself, shuddering as the cold water touches his chest; he lets his legs lift off the ground.

“There – see?” Arthur says. “I’m only holding the top half of you, and the bottom half stays afloat.” Speaking of which … he sneaks a look at the glorious curves of Kai’s wet arse, just showing above the water. “Now kick! Hard as you can!”

Kai kicks his feet; the water splashes up behind him, making rainbows in the air.

Arthur starts walking backwards.

Kai’s grip tightens. His nails dig into Arthur’s flesh. “What are you doing?”

“Letting you get used to the feel of moving through the water. We’re going across the river.”

“What – right across?” Kai’s eyes widen.

“Right across,” Arthur says. “We’re going all the way, together.”

“Don’t let go!”

“It’s not that deep,” Arthur says, laughing.

“Don’t laugh at me!”

“Well, you are a silly goose.”

Kai starts to protest, and gets a mouthful of water.

“What did I say about trusting me?” 

Kai spits and coughs; Arthur keeps a tight hold on his arms.

They reach the other side, and Kai puts his feet down in the mud. He stands there, his chest heaving. Water trickles from his hair, and tracks down his chest, around his nipples. 

“What next?” he says, when he has got his breath.

Kai is so close; next, Arthur wants to kiss the water droplets from his lips – and other places – but he doesn’t dare. He tries to still the flutter in his stomach.

“Arthur?”

“Oh. Sorry. Next you … um … need to learn to move your arms.”

Kai frowns. “So, will you hold onto my feet?”

“No.” Arthur stands with his hands out, a little way below the surface. “Lie in the water, with your stomach on my hands.”

Kai hesitates.

Perhaps this is too much …

“My stomach?” 

“Don’t you trust me?” Arthur says, a challenge in his eyes.

“It’s not that.”

“Well, what is it, then?”

Arthur knows what it is.

They used to sleep in the same bed; wrestle each other; have tickling fights which Kai would always win. They were brothers in everything but blood.

But when Kai passed his twelfth summer – Arthur his tenth – Llud made a separate bed for Kai. Arthur would creep into it when he had bad dreams, and snuggle up to Kai, just like before.

Then one day, he felt Kai stiffen; Arthur flinched away, and scrambled out of bed; he didn’t understand – not then. 

He was the one who didn’t trust.

And Kai, his face red, told him he must sleep alone; never come to his bed again.

He misses Kai.

“Come on, Kai. We’re brothers. There’s no one here to see.”

Kai sniffs, and leans forward, so that Arthur is holding him up. Arthur feels Kai’s stomach muscles, smooth and tight under his hands. Just to be touching him like this, after so long … If this water were not so cold …

“What now?” Kai says, keeping his head as high out of the water as he can.

“Move your hands up and down.” 

Kai slaps at the water.

“One at a time – not both together.” 

“This isn’t what you showed me, on the log,” Kai protests.

“No, this is easier. It’s called dog-paddle.”

Kai struggles back to his feet. “That’s childish. I’m not a dog. I won’t do it, if you make fun of me. Show me the proper way, or not at all!”

“I was just trying to make it easier, to get you started,” Arthur says. “But never mind. This time, when you kick, pull both your feet up to your behind at the same time, kick back and outwards, then bring them back in again. Pretend you’re a frog.”

“So this is frog-paddle.”

“If you like.”

“What about my arms?”

“Push them both out in front of you, and sweep them outwards and down, as if you were pushing the water away, and behind you. As if you wanted nothing more to do with it.”

“Like the other boys.”

“Exactly.” Arthur smiles. “Give them a good kick from me as well. And don’t forget – trust the water. It will repay your trust.”

Kai huffs. “How can I trust something that keeps slipping through my fingers?”

“Keep your fingers together – see? Think of your hands as oars, and your body as a longboat.”

“A boat is hollow.”

“It doesn’t matter. You can still float. Watch me.” Arthur casts himself back upon the water, and lies there, floating.

Kai shakes his head. “How do you do that?”

“I imagine the water is carrying me in its arms, like my mother.”

“I cannot remember my mother.”

“Nothing at all?”

“Nothing,” Kai says. “Can you remember yours?”

“Brief flashes – a beautiful woman, with long dark hair. Her scent … like summer meadows.” Arthur gets to his feet, and puts a hand on Kai’s arm. “I’m sure your mother must have been beautiful too.”

Kai wrinkles his nose. “Why? What makes you say that?”

Arthur swallows. He wants to say, ‘she must have been – she had you.’ He kicks a stone. “Well, everyone thinks their own mother is beautiful, don’t they? And you are my brother – so your mother is mine too. And if I say she was beautiful, then she was.”

Kai snorts. “You have a philosopher’s tongue. You spend too much time with your nose in those books.”

“You’re probably right. But see if you can float. Lie back, and imagine the water is … someone you trust, safely rocking you in their arms.”

“I cannot remember ever feeling safe, either.”

Arthur’s heart breaks for Kai. “You are safe with us. Never mind those other boys. Llud and I will always back you up.”

“I know. But I don’t want to have to rely on other people.”

“Why not? I rely on you. So does Llud.”

Kai snorts. “You … perhaps … a little. But Llud doesn’t need me for anything.”

Arthur shakes his head. “Of course he does. You’re everything to him.”

“Argh …” Kai turns away.

“Honestly,” Arthur says. “What would he do without you?”

Kai sniffs. “Maybe you’re right.”

“I know I am.”

So Kai lies back on the water, his blond mane splayed out around his head; his chest heaving with the effort of staying still. The water laps over his stomach. His nipples are tight knots, their halo, taut and wrinkled from the cold.

“There – you see?” Arthur says, his voice a little hoarse.

Kai opens his eyes. “Yes. It’s peaceful. And you’re right – the water takes some of my weight. Perhaps now, I’ll try to swim.”

So Arthur places his hands under the surface, and Kai rests his lean belly on them again. “Now – push the water back, then kick it away.”

~~

Kai concentrates hard, pushing the water behind him, kicking back. Then suddenly he realises that Arthur is no longer beside him. He splutters, and starts to panic; loses his rhythm; flounders, splashing and coughing. 

Arthur hauls him to his feet.

“You let go of me!”

“But you did it! You were swimming! You were doing so well – supporting yourself. You didn’t need me, until you saw I wasn’t there.”

“But you let go!” Kai dashes the water with his fist. “You promised –”

“– to teach you. Come on, Kai – what kind of teacher would I be, if I kept teaching you the same lesson, after you had mastered it?”

“You really think I was doing alright?”

“Really. Come on – swim a few strokes beside me.”

“Help me get started,” Kai says. “Hold me up.”

Arthur feels his heart leap in his chest. “Gladly.” 

~~

Later, when they are swimming side by side, Kai turns to him. “I should have known … you’ll never let me go under.”

~~

**Author's Note:**

> First archived here: 03 September 2011.  
> Revised: 3 July 2017.  
> Please join the [Arthur of the Britons](http://arthur-britons.livejournal.com/profile) community on Livejournal.


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